Different Love
by LenoraWinsdale
Summary: Selena looks back on her failed relationship.


A/N: This is just a really quick one shot… Very unlike my other stories (it's actually finished) I might make another story with similar occurrences… so, yeah… Here it is…

She's different... That's all I can say. Even though there are some pieces of her left, it's still not her. Of course, the love will always be there, but like any energy, it didn't die but it changed.

With all of the arguments, all the fights, all the spitefully missed phone calls, we still said _hello _when we were in the halls but nothing more. We never called one another, even though we knew each other's number by heart, they were never dialed and never saved. I hope one day I could forget the order of those numbers so I wouldn't be so impelled to press the call button.

After nearly an entire Summer, I've been sober from Demi. Everything had fell into place and I was me again; I wasn't Selena _and_ Demi. I remembered who I was before her, before we were an implied _we. _It was odd going to school alone, being invited to parties that she wasn't attending, or showing up to family events without her. As odd as it was, I began to grow used to it... more like robotically moving through the day, and pretending like no one else is tip-toeing around me about the _touchy _subject.

We were going to get married, you know... We planned everything from the dress to our will. Of course it was an on going joke that our ashes would be mixed together so we'd still be having sex even after we're dead... and we were just known like that. We were the hot lesbian couple that everyone wanted to be friends with, and wanted to know. We were even going to have one another's last name: Selena Gomez-Lovato and Demi Lovato-Gomez. It just sounded right, which made it all oh so believable...

Five Months Earlier...

"I can't believe I'm late to my SAT prep class again!" I huffed as Demi sped towards my school.

"Yeah, but it was so worth it, right?" Demi said smugly.

I rolled my eyes. "I can't keep being late like this!"

"But it was an amazing fuck!" she chuckled but saw the seriousness in my expression. "Relax, you'll be like 5 minutes late, tops."

"You're so bad with timing! It takes twenty six minutes to get to the school from my house with zero traffic."

Demi huffed. "I'll get you there! Besides, you'd have to leave much earlier than this if I didn't drive you like I always do!"

"Stop the car!" I said sternly.

"No, I'm getting you to the school."

"I never asked for you to drive me; you offer to drive me, and I would be perfectly fine leaving my house a half hour early just so I could be on time. Stop the car!"

"I'm not letting you walk!"

"If you're gonna rub it in my face all the time that you have a car, and money... I don't want it... any of it."

"I don't rub it in your face!"

"You said, without your car..."

"Doesn't matter, we're here and you're late." she stopped abruptly. I had no idea we were even close. I stepped out of the car and did my best to control slamming the door shut. "Am I going to see you later?" I simply shrugged and walked off.

One Year Ago...

I didn't know anyone at this party except for maybe the birthday girl who I met through Demi. We all sat at the table while they discussed their old schools, friends, and inside jokes that I was completely on the outside from understanding. Still, I laughed with them... awkwardly.

"I'm going out for a cigarette." one of the girls announced and stood from the table.

Demi looked around. "I'll come with you." she bounced up. "I don't want you going alone." I looked around at the unfamiliar faces and stood up as well. "I don't want you to walk in your heels, darlin'." she smiled. "They still hurt from the walk from the car, don't they?"

Defeated, I sat back down, and did my best to acquaint myself with her friends. They all seemed very nice, and willing to make me comfortable. And they all seemed very interested in hearing about me, which was really odd for me. They wanted to know so much about me and I'm quite positive that I barely remember any of their names.

Demi came back sooner than I expected but was gone longer than I hoped. Before she sat down, I gave her a quick kiss and received a strong whiff of cigarettes and mint. "You were smoking?" I narrowed my eyes and felt the entire table fall silent.

"I just had a few drags..." Demi shrugged it off as if it was no big deal.

"You told me you quit." I said in a hushed voice.

"I did. I just took a few pulls."

"That's _not _quitting! You sneaking puffs isn't stopping." I looked around the table and felt everyone's discomfort. It will have to be a fight for another time...

Three Months Ago...

Tests were hard... work _is _exhausting... but luckily I have have Demi. She always makes my day worth it. I was extra tired since I had both school and work two days in a row, and practically killing myself trying to study for my chemistry final. I nearly fell asleep in the car when she picked me up, but we continued to talk, even after I was asleep.

"Hey." Demi giggled. When my eyes fully opened, I realized I was laying in my own bed, with Demi looking up at me, lovingly. "You fell asleep again."

I shrugged with a smile. "I'm exhausted..." I groaned.

"You started saying weird things like, _put the cake down for my bird. _I can only imagine what you dream about."

"I don't even know... It was weird. Like I was talking to you... then I was somewhere else, but still talking to you..."

Demi chuckled. "You're such a crack head."

"I'm just tired..." I laughed.

"So, can we still have sex?"

I pouted. "I'm exhausted."

"But we haven't in over two weeks, and I've been finished with my period for well over a week."

"I just don't have the energy." I yawned. "You can just fuck me while I sleep?"

"That's no fun when you just lay there! We used to fuck every day, sometimes even twice for hours and now I don't get any!"

"I'm tired. I'm in school by 7:25 a.m. then I travel by public transportation to get to work by 3 p.m. then I don't get home until 11:30 p.m." I groaned. "I'm just tired. When school's over, I'll have more time to do that stuff."

"Well, I pick you up!"

"I really think you have no idea how hard I'm working!" I said nearly completely breaking down. "My mom is sick and I'm working 38 hours a week on top of school... and you're just so spoiled." Demi's eyes narrowed. "Your mom makes sure you have everything when mine can't even provide a meal daily for me! Your parents just give you a car that you don't even pay with your own money just so you can go to a school where you're barely passing. I'm busting my ass for us and all you can think about is sex..."

Demi stood without a word, and left, and I was too tired and beyond caring to chase after her.

Two Years Ago...

It was another hang out where I knew no one except for Miley. She made new friends from another town, and felt that I needed to meet new people aside from my childhood. Spending time with new people was a lot more fun than I thought it would be... and Demi was definitely my focus. She was sweet... She held the door open for everyone... and when I said I was thirsty, she made the entire group stop. I really just want to sit next to her.

_She's amazing... but too bad she has a boy friend, and who's to say she even likes me? _I smiled up at her, trying not to drift too far into her perfect smile.

"So," she bit her lip. "What'd you do for fun?"

"Um... I write sometimes... and sing, kinda."

"What'd you mean _kinda?_ You either sing or you don't."

"Like I sing in my room." I shrugged.

"Well, let's hear you."

I cleared my throat, and opened my mouth. "I don't know this song."

We both chuckled. _I love her laugh. _

"Yeah, not too many people know the songs that I listen to, or even the band."

"I listen to weird stuff too, just not anything like this."

"Like what? I bet I know it."

I hesitated, completely embarrassed. "Like, A*Teens..."

She rolled her eyes, and began to sing to my surprise. "_You are my sugar rush. I get weak and talk too much. You're the sweetest thing I ever tasted..." _She laughed as she finished the verse. "C'mon! Give me something harder."

"Kay, um... Hedwig and the..."

Before I could finish my sentence, she gasped and fiddled with her CD case. She handed me the CD with a huge smile. "Track 5. It's my favorite!"

I set the CD in and played the desired track. I recognized it immediately, "When the earth was still flat, And the clouds made of fire, And mountains stretched up to the sky, Sometimes higher, Folks roamed the earth Like big rolling kegs. They had two sets of arms. They had two sets of legs. They had two faces peering Out of one giant head So they could watch all around them As they talked; while they read. And they never knew nothing of love. It was before unknown. The origin of love."

"You have an awesome voice." she said with a huge smile, but all I was able to focus on was her. We sang the entire song, and played the whole mixed CD." Before I knew it, we were in front of my house.

"I had a lot of fun hanging out with you tonight." I said, stumbling over my words.

"Too bad you have a curfew."

I nodded. "Well, maybe we can hang out another time... with Miley and the others..." It totally wasn't a smooth save. "Oh my gosh! I didn't realize it was 10:15!"

"I-I took the long way..." she admitted, and I heavily blushed. "I know you have to go, so I'll just find you on FaceBook... or something." I nodded dumbly with a smile and rushed into my house. I was definitely going to get yelled at, but she's totally worth it.

oOoOo

"Selena!" I heard a figure call out from the dark. "Hey." she shivered.

"H-hey..." I paused. "Where's your car?"

She shrugged. "I got into a bit of an accident a few days ago..."

"You okay?"

She laughed. "Yeah... no..."

"W-what..."

"I'm not okay with this..." she sniffled. "With you not being in my life... I'm just not okay..."

"We can't be together after..."

She cleared her throat. "I know. Nothing like that..."

We both shared a sad smile, fully aware of one another's thoughts. It would be too dangerous to look up from the hug… far too dangerous. With one simple kiss, we knew that it would be more painful than anything we've felt before. It would cut deeper than a blade and pierce further than a bullet. We could never be… ever again.

A/N: Whoa! What a downer... I wrote this before my lunch break... so when I get back, I'll start up on my other story, or continue with another (either Meds or Divided).


End file.
